Just Some Stuff That Makes Me Wonder...

I will admit that I had to look at this woman for quite some time before I actually realized what, exactly, I was looking at. The weird thing is, I found myself wondering how the hell she did that before I had even the slightest clue what 'that' was, the nature of which I shall share with you now.

The woman, (whom I have seen several times since), was wearing a hat. Not any old hat, oh, no. This happened to be a hat that looked like hair. I know what you're thinking, and you are wrong – I do know the difference between a hat and a wig, and this was most assuredly a hat. I know this because I saw her take the damnable thing off. When she did remove her hat that looked like hair, I found myself in yet another binge of wondering. Underneath the hat that looked like hair, she was sporting hair that looked like a hat! Two questions sprang instantly to mind:

1. How the Hell did she manage to do that, and, more importantly,
2. Why the Hell would she even want to?

If you already have hair that looks like a hat, why bother putting on an actual hat? To cover up your horrific hair? Wouldn't you just try to style your hair, attempt to make it resemble something other than a hat? And if you were, in fact, putting on the hat in order to draw attention away from some hairstyle-related deficiency, then WHY THE FUCK would you choose a hat that looked like hair? Why not just toss on a wig?

After much pondering, and as I mentioned, more sightings which allowed me the luxury of intense observation, I have come to the conclusion that the woman is hiding something. Something much, much larger and more worthy of hiding that mere shitty hair. Let me give you a few facts, and let's see if you come to the same conclusion I did:

1. Her hat looked like hair,
2. Her hair looked like a hat,
3. She was unusually tall and thin,
4. She gave new definition to the term 'homely',
5. Her overall bearing and appearance were reminiscent of an emu or ostrich, and finally,
6. I never saw or heard her speak,

As you can see, all the evidence points to only one possible explanation: Inter-dimensional Immigrant from an alternate universe who did little or no homework when it came to relocating to our reality. I welcome your comments and / or theories.

As always, be safe

TRS