As I’ve gotten older, I’ve gone from thinking about stupid, useless shit to pondering that which is truly important. Serious questions, like: At what exact point does a Gin and Tonic become merely a Gin with Tonic? Where do we draw this very important line? How much Gin is little enough to allow Tonic an obvious co-headline position, yet not so much as to relegate Tonic to the ranks of 'Also featuring...’. Is ice-cube degeneration to be included in the equation? If so, would it then be possible for a Gin and Tonic to become a Gin with Tonic without the addition of extra ingredients? Or, does the fact that ice is, when restored to its natural state, representative of neither Gin, nor Tonic, render its inclusion null and void, without force, and remove it from the equation entirely? Do local variations, individual pouring styles, and/or number of ice-cubes typically used affect the overall outcome? Glass size, Tonic availability and desired level of eventual intoxication must also play a vital role in answering this question which has been perplexing mankind for nearly 19 hours now.The solution I personally envision is the formation of an independent 'Gin And Tonic Regulatory Commission’, whose mandate would include (but not be limited to)
a) Setting a standard, internationally accepted Gin/Tonic ratio, and
b) Ensuring this ratio is practiced and upheld, with random spot checks and severe penalties for infractions.
I, for one, would definitely sleep easier, knowing that I could, at any time, in any place on this planet, order up a G&T confidently, without worries or concerns.
As always, be safe,
TRS
Posts
