Wow. It's really getting out of hand fast! Only the beginning of June, crap weather, and yet the Grown Men In Short Pants are out in full force. Yesterday, as I was out on my daily stroll, the bastards outnumbered us sensible Long Pants guys by a long-shot. I encountered another Long Pants-er to exchange data and commiserate with, which truly gave us a good look at the overall situation. He had just come up from the beach (I cover the Uptown shopping district), and the scene there was horrific! He said it seemed as though he was the only male on the entire strip who had his walking sticks properly covered. A third LP'er, who generally covers the rural beat, has not been heard from in close to a week, and we fear the worst. It is rare, yet not entirely impossible, for one of us to turn into one of 'them', usually at the behest of a female companion who tells us we'd look adorable in short pants. Without others of our kind present to run interference, the poor gent inevitably goes down under the extreme pressure, and another is lost forever. We mark the passing of a brother not by flying a flag at half mast, but by wearing extra-long pants for a seven day mourning period. If I've heard nothing from our rural outpost by tomorrow, I shall have the sad task of telling the others to prepare for the worst, and break out the Extra-Longs. It's a call I fervently hope I will not have to make.
Wish me luck, and, as always, be safe.
TRS
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